D-DAY (WEEK)

Well, today's the last day of the year. Next week will be busier than a one-armed wallpaper hanger. That's enough about work, though!

Yesterday, I was able to walk downstairs at P.T. I guess my brain forgot how to do it. I was trying to bend my right (injured) leg enough to get my left foot flat on the next step before I lifted it. Surprise! You're supposed to step down and trust that your right leg will release and let you hop down. Last year, I never could have imagined that my body could forget how to do things in just a few months.

Crazedmom of three should be home today. They've been camping on the coast. I keep checking the weather and it has rained steadily at their location. I sure hope they had a good time. Ol Hosstail Snake is also back. Qwest has a lot to answer for when the rest of us don't get our daily dose of Gene.

Mom goes home Wednesday. I hate to see her go back into the ice and snow but the rest of the family is there and she has to take care of some medicare stuff. She has started eating too many carbs at my house and that concerns me a bit but she has had diabetes for five years now and kept it well in check, so I leave it up to her. There's nothing worse than people treating you like an idiot just because you're aging.

The kids are coming over for New Year's. Last year, my husband and I had our own party. I inherited some really old homemade records. Most of them were from 1949. Some were earlier because there was one of my Uncle Harvey singing and he died in 1945 or 1947. I bought my husband a turntable and we spent the night drinking wine and recording. The quality was very poor because the records were so damaged but for this Christmas, we were able to give my Mom a copy. There was her and Dad singing (with Dad playing the guitar), her and Aunt Anna (her closest sister) and the finale was Uncle Harvey. She was very pleased and I expect there will be a big clamor from back home for some copies. Actually, I was present in the January 1949 because I was born in July. Pretty cool, Huh?

I still miss my Dad. He was so loving. He was crabby and not always kind but he sure loved us and we knew it. Some of my favorite memories are of harmonizing with him when our band played at family functions.

Anyway, time to go. Talk to you later.

GOODBYE CHRISTMAS

Well, the hardest holiday of the year is over once again. Now I just have to get through the next three weeks at work. This time of year has more pressure than any other time.

I received some very nice gifts this year and I hope the gifts I gave pleased everyone else. We had a nice dinner and good company.

This week finishes up my physical therapy until I go back to the doctor in January. I can't get flexion anymore than 105 so I'll be having some arthroscopic surgery in April or May to clean things up. I hate to go three weeks without therapy. It really does offer some pain relief.

Mom goes home next Wednesday morning at 5:22 a.m. We'll have to get a room in Fresno because we're having a lot of fog right now. I dread her going back but she has medicare stuff to take care of at home and the grandchildren back there are missing her a lot. It's been a really good visit.

Hubby bought me some memory foam for our bed for Christmas. I think it will help me sleep. Last night, though, I was sleepless because I let myself take an afternoon nap. I know better. Also, I had a new Alex Cross novel that I just couldn't stop thinking about. As long as I couldn't sleep anyway, I finished it. Oh Well!

We had a huge ham for Christmas (from my company). I think tonight the rest gets frozen. We have had omelets, biscuits and gravy, fried rice and ham sandwiches. Enough already!

Mom said she has gained weight since she's been here and Hubby has too! I don't know why because I seem to be losing. I haven't been able to get back an appetite since my accident. My size twelves are getting baggy and I am 5 foot 8 inches. I have no desire to look like a stick woman so I hope I get hungry soon.

Well, there's nothing humorous today. I just wanted to update family.

COUNTDOWN TO CHRISTMAS

Well, only four days to go. The weekend was great. We enjoyed all the grandchildren and the cookie trays are all finished. The neighbors are all bought for and our mail lady got her favorite turtles. Whew! The only hitch was the that my daughter's puppy made a mess on her bedding in the motor home so there was some extra laundry.

I've wound up sick (flu like) so it's a little difficult to get into the spirit of things this week. Everyone at the office has been sick so it is kind of expected. Merry Christmas to us.

I wanted to tell the story that illustrates the kind of presents my husband used to give. One year I mentioned several times how much I would like to have a rowing machine. To my great surprise, a box of the right shape and weight appeared behind the tree. I bragged to everyone how my husband had really listened when I was hinting and how proud I was.

Christmas morning I opened the package and found guess what? A closet organizer! Now, Hubby had been nagging that he wished my side of the closet was as tidy as his so not only was it not what I wanted, but it was an insult besides and clearly what he wanted me to have. I didn't say anything but I sure was hurt and disappointed. I guess one of my girls told him because that was the end of that kind of present.

If a woman asks for that kind of stuff, it is fine. But, poor is the husband who doesn't listen or care enough to buy a personalized present. We had a guy here at work who bought his wife a commerical mop and scrub bucket for her birthday (I can't believe he's still married.).

Here is a list of poor Christmas presents (unless requested by your wife):

1. A closet organizer
2. Any kind of household cleaner (including a vacuum cleaner, carpet shampooer, steam cleaner, etc.
3. Any clothing over size 14 (we would rather return it and get the right size.)
4. Tools
5. Pots, pans or silverware
6. Dish towels and or cloths
7. A duster
8. Any and all gifts that require you to use elbow grease or that can used for any kind of household chores.

Here is a list of good Christmas presents:

1. Perfume (one that she actually uses)
2. Nighties or P.J.'s
3. A warm robe
4. Pretty slippers
5. Clothing in normal sizes
6. A gift certificate for her favorite restaurant
7. Candles with a purpose-such as aroma therapy (not cookie baking crap)
8. An IOU to clean the kitchen for a week.
9. An IOU for a weekend at HER favorite place.
10. An IOU for babysitting
11. A card that says I love you.

8, 9, and 10 would be especially effective if you want sex.

Talk to you later.

OH DARN!

I forgot our neighbors. One more damn trip to the store! Ho Ho HO!

Hallelujah!

My last present is wrapped and gone. Whew! All that's left is cookie day.

Cookie day has become a tradition with Hubby. There are actually eight offices in his complex and we make huge trays of cookies the weekend before Christmas. The favorite cookie is, of course, filled cookies which are a huge pain in the ass. This is everyone's favorite cookie when we give them out but strangely enough, no one has ever asked for the recipe. A few year's ago, I made up a few pages of family recipes I had. The only one that was truly lost was Aunt Renie's blueberry cake and it was to die for. Even her daughter doesn't have it.

We start on Saturday and make our dough and filling. Sunday morning we get up early and start rolling, baking and decorating. I guess this is what people without small children get to do at Christmas. Woo Hoo!

My youngest daughter is coming down with her three kids and I have already commandeered the teenager to make snickerdoodles. Her's are wonderful. We also do molasses cookies to round everything out. My daughter has decided to take the three year old and spend the day at his other grandma's house. She's pretty sure she won't be able to keep him off the cookie table.

Actually, I'm really looking forward to this time. It will be hectic and messy but both my girls and all my grandkids will be here and that pleases me greatly. I expect the six year olds will want to help decorate and set up the plates. What could be more fun? It will be like when my kids were little. It's nice to be needed.

POEM

I'm not entering the lipo contest but I do like to write poems. Here goes.

Dear Morning Rave:

I need to win some liposuction
so I may have a butt reduction

My belly has become so round
it gurgles up in sur-round sound

In my mirror is no chin
it made itself a little twin

My arms are flabby, thighs are dimpled
I'd really rather have some pimples

As long as I am going to rant
I'd rather have a whole transplant

Just put my brain in some hot Babe
It's youth and beauty that I crave

When "Star" material I then make
I'll share my pile with Hosstail Snake!

CHRISTMAS JOKES

When I lived in Maine, the highlight of the season was Christmas jokes. My family probably spent more time on those kind of presents than the real kind. Some of them were pretty elaborate.

This year, we've planned a few on Hubby. He wanted a CDG tape of Keith Urban so he could sing along. What I'm wrapping up is some I ordered with really old country music (my favorites so I can have them). Mom bought the one he wanted and is putting it in his stocking (which he opens last).

I think I need to go to the dollar store so I can find more stuff. One year I wrapped up a rubber chicken for my son-in-law. One year I wrapped up a donut that was a month old before Hubby unwrapped it (he pissed and moaned because we didn't buy him a donut when we all had one.)

Anyway, I'll keep you all posted if I come up with any really great stuff. That's what memories are made of.

MUSIC ON MY MIND

It's a great day! I feel like me! There's almost no pain today and "Herman's Hermits" popped in. "Woke up this morning feeling fine, got something special on my mind!". I loved those guys. There was no one cuter than Peter Noone. Soon after we moved to California, my dear husband gave my albums to my kids to sell on a yard sale. Because we were new to this area, we had no idea what happened to vinyl at 110 degrees. Luckily, I rescued my first Beatle's album. I would have killed him if that was gone. Lord, we thought we were such rebels! Compared to some of today's happenings, we were angels singing in a holy choir.

As an older adult, I no longer fixate and daydream about singers and stars. I love Jackie Chan, who I think every woman thinks of in a maternal way. I also love Vin Diesel who I must admit, fills my mind in a most unmaternal way. That guy has more sex appeal than any star has had since Cary Grant. Nope, he just doesn't bring out my maternal instincts at all! (That does sound like a fixation! Sorry!)

I took my Mom out to dinner and Christmas shopping last night. She really is feeling better! She about wore me out. I thought she might be finished but she's still looking forward to a shopping trip with my oldest daughter.

Last night I did the unthinkable. I saw a darling outfit for Mr. Man on sale. That means I have to start the "even it all up" process on the rest of the grandkids. I never learn! What a sucker!

Work is going well. As soon as the other girls are done posting this morning, I'm going to do some grower credit posting. I can't send checks yet because our funds are a little slow this year. I really like to send them a check before December 10th so everyone has a little extra for property taxes. It's not going to happen so I'm going to aim for the week before Christmas.

I ordered Hubby the Karaoke tape he wanted yesterday of Keith Urban. Mom is going to buy it for me and put it in his stocking which we always open last. Instead, I am going to wrap up for him the Karaoke I bought myself for Christmas. It has Kitty Wells, Wanda Jackson, Red Foley, etc. You get the picture. I'm stuck on the old music and he likes the new. It's going to be great watching him try to be gracious when he opens it (and gracious he will be because he's a nice man). It almost gets me even for my Herman and the Hermits album. Almost!

Never let it be said that I can't carry a grudge.

I almost forgot the best thing about yesterday! When I wrote the date at work, I remembered it was my baby brother's birthday and he was turning 50. Thanks to the magic of our local florist, he received a bouquet of black carnations from his loving sister. Thank God, they were able to get them to him in time. He's a wonderful husband, Dad, granddad, brother and just all around kindly person. It almost seems cruel to treat him in this manner. I love it! In four years I will be sixty and I expect my sister and two brothers will be really showing payback for their birthdays I have honored. Maybe I will just go on vacation then so no one can find me!

Well, I am really rambling! Oh No! No the Allman Brothers will be stuck in my head all darn day.

KIDS ARE FUNNY

This is sure a hectic time of year. Also, my Mom is staying in the bedroom where the computer is located so I don't have much access to my home computer right now. That's why I haven't been blogging. That's my story and I'm sticking to it.

My daughter posted a picture of her ficus tree with presents under it and it reminded me of a story from her childhood.

We'd been remiss in getting up our Christmas tree that year. One day about two weeks before Christmas, we came home to the most pitiful sight I'd ever seen. My youngest daughter (about 13 at that time) had brought in a large branch that had fallen from our weeping willow tree. She had stood it up in the Christmas tree corner and decorated it with some rather pathetic homemade decorations. My husband and I both laughed hysterically but were really ashamed of ourselves at the same time. She sure got the point across that Christmas is for kids and as adults we owe it to them to get off our duffs and make sure that kids will have a joyous season.

Another story about this particular child is from when we first moved to CA and we were so broke. She was twelve and I thought it would be okay not to buy Easter candy. Of course, I was not okay with it. It was really depressing.

She went to bed and I was out tidying the kitchen when I decided I just couldn't stand it and started raiding my cupboards. I had no chocolate chips and absolutely nothing to cook with but some powdered sugar. I would up making potato candy flavored with peppermint. I colored it and made it into egg shapes. For a basket, I took an old plastic peanut butter pail, punched holes in it and picked yellow roses from an outside bush to fill the holes. I left it on the table and went to bed still feeling mighty blue.

The next morning, there was a knock on our bedroom door. In popped C. She had taken four socks and stuffed them with paper. Two were hanging down off a baseball cap to make floppy ears. Two were pulled over her shoes to make huge bunny feet. She had her basket in her hand and hopped through the room for us several times. We were all laughing but it was one of those moments (for me) that you almost feel like crying because you did something right for your child. It was also one of those moments when you realize that what little bit of joy you bring to your children will be repaid a thousandfold.